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Life's Challenges and the New Year

There has been progress in 2021, even though some days if may not have felt that way. I am not the same person I was a year ago, a month ago, or a week ago. I am always growing and my experiences don't stop. That's part of life. And the very experiences that seem so hard when I am going through them are often the ones that I'll look back on with gratitude for what they taught me and how far I have come.

NOTE- Article adapted* from a variety of sources. (editor note- I'll try to post credit links as I find them)

The biggest and most complex obstacle I will ever have to personally overcome is my own mind. In other words, I am not responsible for everything that happens in life, but I am responsible for undoing the self-defeating thinking patterns that undesirable experiences create.

We are all familiar with New Year's Resolutions. I prefer to make some New Year suggestions to help set up 2022 to be a year of wellness. Below are a few reminders and thoughts for consideration:

  1. I can’t calm another adult’s storms and it’s not worth trying. What I can do is calm myself. The storms will pass. The most powerful changes happen in my life when I decide to take control of what I do have power over, instead of craving control over everything I don’t.
  2. What I pay attention to grows. Good and bad. I can practice focusing on what matters, and letting go of what does not.
  3. The first step to inner peace is letting go of what I assume my journey is supposed to be like right now, and sincerely appreciating it for everything that it is.
  4. I cannot control exactly what happens in life, but I can control how I respond to it all. In my response is my greatest power.
  5. No single struggle defines everything I am. No single chapter tells the whole story. I will remember to keep turning the pages that need to be turned.
  6. When life feels like an emotional roller coaster, I can help steady myself with simple rituals. Make the bed. Water the plants. Rinse off my own bowl and spoon. Simplicity attracts calmness and wisdom.
  7. If the grass looks greener on the other side, I’ll stop staring, stop comparing, and start watering the grass I’m standing on.
  8. SLEEP! Am I getting enough sleep? Probably not or not enough good sleep! I will assemble a daily routine that specifically includes a consistent time to go to bed, which allows me at least 7 hours of sleep.
  9. ACCEPT! I can practice radical acceptance. Wellness starts with accepting reality and the current moment as it is. The more I fight what is, the more stress I load on myself.  I’ll offload that weight by practicing acceptance.
  10. LAUGH! I can create space every day to laugh. I can make time to chat with the co-worker who makes me giggle before a string of meetings. I can listen to a funny podcast when doing my simpler work or other activities. Laughing is good for our souls and for my body. 
  11. CREATE! Paint. Draw. Sing. Create for the sake of creation. I won’t censor myself; I will let the power of creativity work its magic on me.
  12. CLEAN! Even if cleaning is not my thing, my brain works better when there is less clutter for it to process and a clean room or home for me to be in. I may even find some things I can donate.
  13. SAY NO! I will give myself permission to say no to anything I don't want to do. I’ll start for the next 10 days to show myself how restorative it can be to say no, when NO is the right answer. I deserve it. My body, mind, and spirit need it.
  14. SAY YES! I will give myself permission to say yes to anything I want. As with the permission to say no, I’ll start actively practicing saying yes to what I want, for the next 10 days. I’ll say yes to naps, hanging out with good friends, reading that book I’ve been putting off, etc. etc. etc. I will say yes to things that make me feel good.
  15. REFLECT! As I think back on this year, I will reflect on what I have accomplished, what I have learned, how I grew, who I helped, and anything else that reminds me that even though it was not always a good year, it really was a good year. I will give myself permission to celebrate the wins. 
  16. PLAN! I will plan for 2022 to be the year I want. I will write down 3 things I will commit to doing in 2022 for my wellness. I will give myself permission to change my plans if I come up with better ones, but those too, I will write down.

And yes, of course all these are sometimes easier said than done. And if I’ve learned one thing this year, it’s that I need to be gentle with myself and others. We’re all a bit weary and stressed. It’s okay for me to be recklessly gracious every now-and-then!

I won't always be a priority to others, and that's why I have to be a priority to myself. I can practice respecting myself, taking care of myself and becoming a solid part of my own support system. My needs matter too! I can start meeting them and stop waiting on others to choose me. I will choose myself today and into 2022!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

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*For KC CoDA purposes, articles are edited to come from an "I/me" perspective. They also may have edited content and format.

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