To stay sane in an insane world, we benefit from using fresh and effective new tools and techniques. We also have to keep doing the things that safely got us where we wanted to go. Those tools can help us build balance-enhancing attitudes and practices into our daily lives, so they are as much a part of our routines as breathing. Then, we keep watch to make sure we’re staying on track. Balance gets stronger with self-care practice, over time. Soon, self-care becomes something we start to do every day, not just when stress is high. Meditation, self-compassion, and acceptance become the new norm, not just a one-time thing.
But changing habits takes time and if we don’t stay on top of our game, we run the risk of drifting back to our old, less resilient ways. Just like our cars, we too need regular maintenance. Having a way to regularly check in with ourselves to make sure we’re using and refreshing the tools and techniques that help us achieve and maintain a healthy balance.
To help stay on track, one of the available tools is the Personal Craziness Index (PCI). The PCI was first presented by author Patrick J. Carnes in his groundbreaking book on recovering from addiction, A Gentle Path Through the Twelve Steps. But it turns out that the PCI has uses beyond maintaining sobriety, and one of them is to monitor life balance.
The PCI is a universal tracking tool that can be used by anyone to monitor and maintain life balance. It relies on the fact that in both subtle and obvious ways we respond to aspects of our lives differently when we’re in balance than when we are not.
The PCI is a build-it-yourself tool. In each of 10 major life areas, the PCI lists several indicators, that we select, of behaviors characteristic of we are in balance. We then track those every day, to capture our awareness of when we are omitting one or more of those in-balance indicators or behaviors that day.
If we notice we’re slipping back into unbalanced behaviors, chances are good we are headed for a major tilt in the near future if we don’t take corrective action. What’s nice about the PCI is that corrective actions are built into it. Often, all we have to do to get back in balance is resume the healthy indicator activity or behavior that we overlooked or stopped doing.
For instance, suppose that in the “Health” category we wrote that when we’re feeling balanced, we go to the gym three times a week, cook our own meals, and sleep at least seven hours per night. Although each of these actions alone may seem unimportant, as indicators of overall balance, they can be indicative and invaluable. Not completing one or two of the indicators is usually not an issue. However, when we find that several indicators are missed, particularly over a period of several days, it starts to set us up for bigger issues.
When we notice we’re skipping the gym, picking up junk food, or skimping on sleep for example, we become aware that we’re also slowly becoming more vulnerable to imbalance. At this stage, because we’ve given up only a little ground, re-balancing is still easier to achieve: We can focus ourselves to return to the gym, cook our meals, and get more sleep, and the downward slide reverses. Detecting and correcting mild imbalance is much easier than restoring balance once we’ve been toppled.
In 12-step recovery programs, the phrase “fake it till you make it” expresses the idea of using our will to assume new, more self-actualizing behaviors and attitudes. The PCI helps us “fake it till we make it” at a point where the quantity of will that’s needed to keep our personal craziness at bay is minimal. And over time, we will no longer be ‘faking’ it; It will become part of our normal routine of self-care.
What to do:
1. Create Your Own Personal Craziness Index. Listed below are 10 suggested categories for the Personal Craziness Index. If some of these categories don’t fit your situation, you can substitute others that do. Under each category, write 1-3+ (3 is ideal) indicators or behaviors that you are in a good place — list either things you do that keep you in positive territory or things you don’t do that also show you are doing well. For example, under Health/Hygiene you might list “exercise 3x per week” as something you do to stay fit, or “don’t eat junk food” as a reminder to avoid doing something unhealthy.
2. Track the indicators. Give yourself 1 ‘point’ for every category that was met that day; 0 points for a category that was not met. At the end of each day, tally up how you did. A score of 7 or below, on any given day is your sign to review the day for improvement in self-care / self-love. Keep a daily log. NOTE: You get a “0” for days you don’t bother to check!
3. If your score dips below 7, reverse the trend by resuming the positives on your PCI and avoiding the negatives. When your Personal Craziness Index is restored, your personal craziness will likewise diminish; Your personal sanity restored. Watch for excuses and rationalizations, like: “My kids (spouse / boss/church, etc) needed me to ______, which is why I wasn’t able to complete that indicator(s).” In those instances, it’s useful to remember the airline flight attendant’s coaching: “Put your oxygen mask on yourself first, THEN assist others.” You are not as useful and effective to others, when you are running low or flat out of gas.
Example categories and indicators:
